Friday, August 29, 2014

blog post eight.

so as you all know or some of you know and some of you don't.
i'm in college.
it's overwhelming and it has been such a positive experience.
a lot of work and a lot of new friends and all these new experiences.
so as being an only child and honestly only having my mother my whole life. it has gotten hard for me to let go of being at home. it has been a rough experience for me to try and move on but... i know i need to do this.
i need to know i can be on my own. i need to learn to not only be myself but embrace it. it will only make me a stronger person and spending this week on campus at my friends dorm has opened my eyes to many things and i love my mother don't get me wrong and i'll miss her dearly ( even though she's only an hour away) but it's timing and timing is essential to most things in life and now it's my time to move it's my time to focus and be a better person then i was the day before. i love every aspect of this change in my life and sooner or later i'm going to have to move on.

it's something that feels as if i'm letting go of everyone who was back at home and embracing new people but it's not that. i love everyone at home they shape me. they've been there through thick and thin and through all the stuff that's happened to me. through every tear and every smile and i love them all for that. i love seeing them but i basically live on campus already. i don't get home until 9pm and usually my friends are living their own lives which is ok and it's amazing i'm so happy for all of them but it's time i live my own. it's time for me to let go and it's certainly time for me to learn to embrace this new side of what i'm going into.

they'll always be a part of me and for that i'm forever grateful and as painful as it is to start i so have to. i can't make decisions based on other people. it's something hard but maybe you guys will understand what i'm trying to say. it's an amazing journey and my focus has to be solely on books and reading and studying and maybe sometime in between my friends will try and make time for me as i have done for them but let's just see how that goes.

just some tips of mine.
i'd rather not speak of
lots of love and happiness


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